Weddings

Weddings have officially been a big part of my life in the last three months. And it is fair to say they are the most enjoyable party I have yet to experience. What could be better than spending a night of your life with your favorite people, in a beautiful setting, celebrating one of the closest loves to that of the love God has for us? Oh and did I mention the wine and dancing?

There is something most freeing about getting loose and dancing the night away. For me, dancing can be one of the most therapeutic and joyous activities. I imagine that when the bible speaks of the being a time to mourn and a time to dance, it is referring to the dancing in a wedding. I believe weddings and funerals give the perfect earthly examples of reasons to mourn and to dance. In this sense weddings and funerals are opposite ends of the spectrum. I think the world tells us to think this way. For in death there is only sorrow. But a wise man whom is very dear to me has taught me the joy that there is in death.

My father has always joked about being ready to go and die. He puts a disapproving face on my mom when he says, "yeah it wouldn't be so bad to die, I'd get to blow this joint." I typically frown and ask how he could think this way. But, as the saying goes: like father like son. I think my dad is right. A funeral may be a reason for just as much celebration as a wedding. Shouldn't we all be jumping for joy to return home, and to spend eternity with the One who loves us best. I sure know I am! But let's return to weddings so I can conclude this post.

While we do have something great to look forward to in death, there is much to celebrate in life. And I am blessed to have been a part of so many celebrations of these last few months. How exciting it is to see time and trouble, and patience, and ultimate care climax in a grand joining of two people. There are few things like it on this earth, and I desire to know that same joy for my own. For now, I have patience and I celebrate what I DO have. For I know He will give me the desires of my heart. And He will do the same for you.

Crossword

Tanner Judkins came "home" today. I say "home" because he doesn't really live here, but I consider him when I think of someone who has such a strong role in my life. With some people you spend a month apart and you forget who they are and how to talk to them, but it's not like that for me with Tanner. We didn't miss a beat. The main evidence I have for this bold statement, is that we spent most of our time together working on a crossword puzzle and making food. We then went to Heather's play and exchanged jabs and winks as we sat in the audience. I get excited thinking about his wedding which arrives in one week. It is a meaningful time for all of us and I feel honored to know someone who makes me feel at home; he is one of the few that I consider a brother.

Work

So I have been thinking a lot about work recently. I find it quite fitting as it has quickly become my life. My fun events are no planned around when I beat a quest in a Zelda game or when my last kill in Halo 3 will be. They are planned around when I get off work, and when I NEED to go to sleep in order to function at work.

Over the past couple years I have come to recognize just how much of a free spirit I am. I love driving around town and walking the streets to see what shop or restaurant or people will catch my eye. I find that I need this type of part in my day. So like all things in life, I have begun to schedule these times around my work schedule. I may head downtown alone for lunch to eat Chipotle.

One of the reasons why I like my job a lot right now is that I feel very free. I never really knew what it would be like to have so much responsibility in the things for which I get paid. I am able to schedule my own 6 week calendar of travel paid for completely by Westmont. It is a cool and scary to think about all the dollars that are going into my "research" and travel about where I will go, and whom I will see, and HOW I will see them. But it is cool indeed.

One big dilemma that has arisen is the issue of how much of work I "bring" from work. Do I talk about work when I get off or is it really important for me to leave those things at the office. I have had a pretty hard time with this, as I notice how much it makes me un-relatable. I spend over 8 hours of my day with the same people doing the same things, and that is a third of my day. It is weird. But I have come to realize that it really is okay. I know that I am no longer in college. The things that I do will never be the same, and work really is a big part of my life now. It is my mission and it is my passion. I think I understand more what it means to do one thing and to do it well. I strive for this in my work.

So as I sit here sipping my glass of wine and being alone after my 8:30am-10pm day of work I feel good. My clothes are ironed and soon I will sleep. I will fade into my dreams and process whatever is on my mind. And tomorrow I will wake, the same as any other day. But, with a different schedule and with something new to be anxious or excited about. And hopefully I will have some sort of party to attend or people to see after my "work" is done.

The Troubadour

So I was sitting here and wondering what to say, and I decided to write about my experience at the Greg Laswell concert at the Troubadour in L.A. The venue was a great despite the sweat that resulted as people were standing shoulder to shoulder and front to back. And although the music was great and the environment was unique, my favorite part of the show was that I stood next to Elijah Wood for about 1.5 hours. The thing that struck me was not the many jokes that I thought of to say such as,"I'm hoping to visit New Zealand, would you mind telling me how to get to the Shire, oh and are those gross orcs still roaming the land," but the collection of thoughts that came from observation. My thoughts resulted from curiosity about his life. What would it be like to go around and have every single person know you? How would you act in public, and what would drive your decisions? I felt trapped for him. I watched as he looked directly ahead, avoiding a tilt of the head, or a shift of the eyes, and I wanted to tell him it was okay. He could do what he wanted, look around without fear, yell, and be free. It was in that moment that I was happy to be me. Despite being able to tap my foot and look around, I was able to watch a famous person (and he couldn't). In no way am I saying I have a better life, or saying he must not be happy. But it made me think more about the differences and the similarities we (all humans) share.

There are so many things in life that are great equalizers. When one leaves for college, when one graduates, or when one begins their relationship with Christ; these things remind that we are all the same. My green eyes may be different than the deep brown eyes of my sister, or my love for volleyball, different than Craig's love of guitar, but deep down we need the same things, and I love being reminded of this. Which is why I look anxiously and excitedly to the greatest equalizer of all, death. When all will be judged for what they did or didn't do in this blip of time we call our life. How beautiful it will be. To look past one another's faults or successes, and to see them, naked and vulnerable, and yet complete. When I will be held responsible for my life, and when I along will every single human being, will no longer fear. We will all be able to shout, and look around, and tap our feet to the beat (sometimes the little things make the biggest differences).

On a very different note, I decided to edit and revise my blog post today, so I hope it is less ridden with grammar mistakes, and spelling issues, and poor writing. But I desire to fix my writing issues through this blog as well. And if you wish to do the same, here are a few pointers from, "The Elements of Style," by William Strunk Jr. and E.B. White.

"4. Write with nouns and verbs

Write with nouns and verbs, not with adjectives and adverbs. The adjective hasn't been built that can pull a weak or inaccurate noun out of a tight place. This is not to disparage adjectives or adverbs; they are indispensable parts of speech. Occasionally they surprise us with their power, as in

Up the airy mountain,

Down the rushy glen,

We daren't go a-hunting

For fear of little men...

The nouns mountain and glen are accurate enough, but had the mountain not become airy, the glen rushy, William Allingham might never have got off the ground with his poem. In general, however, it is nouns and verbs, not their assistants, that give good writing its toughness and color."

New Perspective

So I have been having a blog crisis lately. I think of the different reasons for which I update on my blog. My feelings range from the loneliness to pride as I think that nobody is listening or that everyone is. And believe me, I have hoped for both while I have been writing on my blog. So with all that in mind I have decided to continue my blog exactly how it has been!

The only real change is that I am hoping to actually use it... So many of my friends and those very close to me have had a blog for a while or have just begun, and the things I love the most are how people use them for different ways. They are used to update others on their happenings in life, or the blogs are a way of expressing thoughts of emotions that come from big events or daily stories. Ultimately, I love it. I have found it to be a great step in learning how to communicate. I typically end my day without having expressed all that I am thinking or feeling, and I want to have a hard copy. It is just like reading a book that I can hold and touch as opposed to reading it off of a computer screen.

So, in conclusion, I hope to be blogging more in this upcoming season. And I expect and hope to see all of you (this is the time where I hope you are reading my blog) blogging more as it brings me great joy to get those little bits and pieces that are dying to leave your mind and heart.